I remember about eight years ago when Imani's father and I were splitting up. Not only was my family as I knew it falling apart, but everything in my life seemed in disarray.
I couldn't believe I was finding myself in this situation -- a single mom of a bi-racial daughter -
with no clue how to raise a child
and no clue how to raise a bi-racial daughter
and no clue how to get my life on track.
I needed a break, so I packed Imani in the car and headed off to Virginia with a friend. She was going to visit her daughter and I was going to visit my friend Jennifer, who I'd known since kindergarten.
We made the 12 hour trek together and, looking back, I'm surprised my friend agreed to travel such a long distance with a two-and-a-half year old in the back seat. I'm glad she did.
Staying with Jennifer was a welcome break from all the craziness I was experiencing. My life had become something off a bad, dramatic daytime talk show like Ricki Lake or Maury Povich and my head was spinning.
Jennifer's house offered me peace and quiet. In my thinking I noticed a recurrent theme in Jennifer's house.
She had fancy drawer pulls on her dressers, bureaus and cabinets.
I remember we had dinner at another friend's house during my stay and lo and behold, she too had fancy drawer pulls -- drawer pulls shaped like flowers, birds, butterflies . . .
I commented on their drawer pulls and how fancy they looked and I think Jennifer and Laura both thought I was joking.
"Seriously, Steph . . . drawer pulls take all of five minutes to put on!" Jennifer said laughing.
I thought about it for a minute.
"I guess when your life is so full of drama, you don't have time to notice drawer pulls," I said.
"That's it. When I go home, I'm getting fancy drawer pulls."
It sounds silly, but I was dead serious. When your life isn't full of drama, you can notice the details around your house. It became a running joke that week and when I left, Jennifer and Laura gave me six of these:
I still have them and will likely keep them forever.
To me, they are symbolic of having a drama-free life (for the most part!!).
Sure, life gets hectic and crazy, but it's not out of control anymore.
And I'm happy to report that just the other day, I was in Hobby Lobby perusing one of my favorite aisles and I remembered Jennifer and Laura.
So I made a little purchase for our little guy's bedroom.
And when I got home, I replaced these
May he have a life free of drama.
What about you? Do you have fancy drawer pulls?